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I'm the King of Winter Sniffles – and I'm Able to Reveal How to Avoid One

At this point a year ago, I found myself filming a television show alongside three vocalists. There was a hip-hop artist with Ghanaian roots, a major pop celebrity, and an acclaimed classical singer. It was deep midwinter. The previous evening, I’d been at an old friend’s 60th birthday, squeezed into a pub's event space in the Surrey region. It was an enjoyable evening, but now, simply to make conversation, I questioned ways to dodge the common cold as numerous attendees were players in a symphony of coughs, sneezes, snuffles and nose-blows. On a side note, what explains the trumpet-like nose blows, and others don’t? Something to explore later.

Their Take from the Trio

When I brought up my evening, these three musicians backstage at the TV studio responded in two ways. First, they moved back a bit. Secondly, they started a passionate debate about preventing colds and this understandable due to their profession was a major concern for them. That makes sense, but I have skin in this game too – preventing colds is crucial for me since my colds are more severe than others'. I lack official documentation, but I firmly believe it. My colds last longer. My nose is more blocked, I have a more irritated throat, I suffer from louder, more relentless coughing spells. Those at home, alert to the initial throat noises which herald the coming storm, either kick me out of the room or evacuate the area. Back when I presented football on ITV, my poor colleagues in the studio gallery became familiar with the indicators. “Headphones off!” the studio director would holler to his team before I deafened them all, damaging their headset equipment.

Dealing With Nasal Congestion

When it comes to congestion, I could go on and on. Aerosols, liquids, even the sharp aroma of warm spirits my mum prescribes … they provide temporary relief before giving up. And there’s nothing as pitiable than a Brummie tone spoken without the benefit of air passing through the nostrils. In other words, it can sound nasal even normally. Fortunately, this often brings compassion, which isn't ideal. In my first year away at university, separated from family care, the janitor in our dorm took pity on me. “I have the perfect solution, you poor thing. I'll return shortly.” She was very lovely, with a strong Irish accent, and very insistent that I ate the uncooked, peeled onion she brought to my sickbed. She observed me eating it. Kind soul. It didn't help at all, unfortunately, except for upsetting my stomach and making my breath smell terrible.

The Singer’s Health Routine

Therefore, I loathe winter illnesses and am convinced prevention beats cure that whether folk remedies or not, fail to help. I listened intently along with the rapper and the pop star when the mezzo-soprano walked us through her cold avoidance regime. With forthcoming bookings to sing for her supper over Christmas, she was highly committed. She instructed us to sanitize hands regularly all winter long from what I gathered plus, there were special precautions required during festivities. Ahead of any such engagement, she advised several sprays of a nasal spray up each nostril – whether you felt a cold coming or not. Intense. I appreciated it. And, listen to this, she required a repeat application post-event with more spray of the same stuff.

My Experience

I adopted the method. And I must admit I didn't sniffle all winter. There were downsides: the many containers I acquired, lost, repurchased, located, and more. And the disappointing instant you realise you’ve sat on the little vessel of hand gel stored in your pocket and it’s now splurging everywhere. However, all a price worth paying. And now winter’s upon us again, I'm fully prepared with the mezzo-soprano’s recommended ordnance. I’m ready for battle.

AA
The writer

Anthony Ayers

An astrophysicist and science communicator passionate about making space exploration accessible to all.

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